Prank Time
by Lenushka
Summary: A small SSHP fic for now. Harry's seventh year. Pranking his Potions Master. PostVoldemort.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Except my thoughts.

A/N: This is slash, don' like, don't read. Furthermore this is only an one-shot. Lenushka.

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Inspired by:

"Oh, Merlin! The last time I saw a look like that was the night before James, Sirius, Remus and Peter put a Fidelius charm on every bathroom in the school, then sold the locations to people for a galleon per bathroom," exclaimed Minerva. – **Sunset over Britain**

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§1

"POTTER!" could be heard throughout the whole castle. In every room students and teachers winced at the impossibly loud yelling of Professor Snape.

Only mere seconds later he stormed into the Great Hall, marched straight to the Gryffindor table and grabbed a mischievous grinning Harry Potter by the collar. He shook him and then shouted into Harry's still grinning face.

"Potter! Tell me the location, NOW!" by the end he was roaring.

Students stared fascinated at Harry when he was released by the Potions Master and continued grinning in that infuriating manner. "Why, Professor, do I get the feeling that you are a triffle-bit upset?"

"Aargh!" Severus Snape lost control. "Yes Potter I am indeed _upset_!" he barked at his student (who had somehow managed to get into his NEWT-Potions class and had decided to make his last year at Hogwarts a living hell for Severus). Severus couldn't think clearly. All his thinking was set on the task to get the information out of Potter.

"Well", drawled the brat now, "as I can see how terribly upset this little 'spell-casting' has gotten you, …. I could persuade my secret-keeper to tell you…"

At the word 'secret-keeper' everyone perked up sharply and Hermione whispered: "Oh my God, Harry, what have you done now?" This seemed to be her new motto when dealing with her best friend this school year.

Snape was still looking at Harry with barely controlled fury. Harry grabbed in his pocket and brought up a snake, which immediately coiled itself around his arm. "Well Sally" he said gently to the snake, "I think it's safe to tell him now, isn't it?" 'Sally' raised her head till she could look into the Professor's eyes. And then a short sequence of hissing sounds came out of her mouth.

Snape grabbed Harry by the collar and pushed-dragged him out of the Great Hall. The last thing the students heard from Harry was: "Well Professor, I think this is totally unnecessary as Sally told you the location." Then a loud 'thud' could be heard. Hermione groaned, would Harry ever learn? While Ron grinned maniacally, he didn't know what Harry had done but it must have been great.

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Outside the Great Hall Severus shoved Harry into the wall. He glared at his student murderous, but too furious to actually say something. "Professor Snape I'd say this is a very compromising situation, isn't it?" Harry let his voice drop deeper than normal. Snape's eyes widened, never had Potter spoken with a voice that was as promising of sex as this deep and low voice was. Overcome by his instincts and needs and incapable of reacting any different, he growled as he slid Harry's arms up the wall and kissed him roughly. Later he would find it very surprising that he was kissed back. A warm and wet tongue slit between his lips as hands slid down beside his and his body was pressed against his student.

hpss - sshp

the end (at least for now)


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: So here's the next chapter. The next update my take a while because I'm visiting Dublin for a week. Also, I might edit the story, because the chapters are really, really short.

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Later that evening Harry returned to the Gryffindor common room. When he entered, everyone stopped in their tracks and stared at him.

Harry raised an eyebrow, he was pretty sure that he had smoothed out his clothing before he had dressed himself again. When some started clapping, he was reminded of his prank earlier that day. Quite an ingenious piece of work, he had to admit to himself. He smirked and made his way to his friends who were sitting at the fire.

As soon as he sat down, Hermione scolded at him. "Really Harry. Was that necessary? Snape was on our side. You really shouldn't agonize him so much!"

Harry laughed. And laughed. "You…. You think I'm doing this to agonize him!" He was clutching his sides by now. "Oh Hermione, thank you, I've not laughed like this for a long time."

Hermione glared at Harry who was _still_ laughing hard.

Ron scrunched up his face. "Well mate, he _was_ pretty angry with you…"

Harry smirked again. "Believe me, he wasn't angry when I left him."

Hermione frowned. She did that a lot lately. Did she know that she would get wrinkles, when she did that too often?

"Oh come on guys, loosen up. Voldemort is dead. It's time to live and let go of the past." "Well you seem to know how to do that?" huffed the brown-haired witch. "What's your problem?" Harry became serious. "Are you angry with me because I don't seem to be much of a role model?" Hermione glared. "Hermione-dearest, I don't have to be a role-model, because I'm not Head Boy. You should rather criticise Ron."

Now it was Ron's turn to glare. At least for a short time.

Hermione tried it again, this time with her I-am-right-expression. "Harry, you are the Boy-who-lived, the Chosen One. You can't deny, that that does not bring responsibilities with it. The wizarding world looks up to you, as their leader. They need you."

"No, they do not." Harry's facial expression turned hard and cold. "They have no right to need me. And you have no right to accuse me of being irresponsible and immature." Hermione tried to interrupt him but he raised his hand to stop her. "You weren't there. Nobody but Snape was. So you have no right to dictate me anything. And it's not as if you know a lot of politics and Ron doesn't either. So you better leave me alone in my decisions."  
"Harry!" Hermione had stood up with a stern expression, as if to scold a child because it had made a mess. "You just wait", she sad with a foreboding expression, "until _Snape _tells you to act like a role-model! Mark my words."  
"You say 'Snape' like it is a bad word." The black-haired young man nearly whispered. Then his expression turned malicious. "Besides, _Severus _thinks exactly the same!" With that he spun on his heel and walked out of the common room again.

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"Ah, you returned earlier than I anticipated." Said a deep voice, marked with dry humour a few minutes later in the dungeons.

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g


	3. Chapter 3

Now, Chapter 3.  
I know, that they are all very short and that it has been a long time now. But the only thing I coud write today was dialogue, so bear with me for the time being. I really try. ;) On a second thought I would also like to complain about the edito on It is really a nuissance trying to edit a document...

SSHP

(prevously:)

_"Ah, you returned earlier than I anticipated." Said a deep voice, marked with dry humour a few minutes later in the dungeons._

(now:)

"Well you may thank my friends for that."

"Ah, your friends indeed."

"Can I sleep here the night?"

"Oh but that would be most improper"

"Oh come off your high horse. It's already improper to kiss a student."

"Your logic is indisputable."

Harry settled himself in a large arm-chair in front of the fire and opened a book ("How to avoid stress when travelling with students") lying on the table.

Severus Snape snorted quietly. "Oh do make yourself comfortable, Mr. Potter."

"Why thank you Severus, I might just do that." Came the reply from behind the book.

The professor seated himself in the armchair opposite, murmuring something that sounded suspiciously like "Impertinent brat".

"ä ö ü"

As the hours passed by, Harry's eyelids grew heavier and heavier until he put the book aside and yawned widely.

"I wondered how long it would take you do get tired."

"You waited for me to get tired?"

"When you put it that way: no. I merely observed your level or tiredness while I was marking essays."

"So you were sneaking glances at me…"

"I did not"

Harry smiled. "Of course you didn't."

"Don't use that tone with me, brat."

He chuckled. "It's the same tone Dumbledore always uses, isn't it?"

Snape glared at him. "I shall not condescend to give that an answer."

"I assume that this was a perfect example for your Snape-superiority."

"I beg your pardon?" He raised his eyebrow to unthinkable heights.

Harry sighed and got up. "Let's not discuss this so late in the evening."

"It was you who brought it up."

"Simply to raise your curiosity."

"How very slytherin of you."

Harry smiled. "Come on, let's go to bed."

Severus looked at him. "You are assuming that I go to bed now."

"Yes of course, you finished marking those essays."

"Why should I follow you?"

"In bed or in general?"

"Do not twist my words."

"Bed. Now."

"We will discuss your presumptuous behaviour tomorrow."

"Oh you want me to stay for breakfast?"

"I did n-"

"That's so sweet of you, Severus." He walked in direction of the bedroom.

"Snapes do not do '_sweet_'!" He followed Harry to the bedroom, adding quietly: "_I_ do not do 'sweet'."

Suddenly Harry appeared in front of him. "Then we have that settled. Now about our sleeping arrangements…"

Still slightly startled Severus sighed. "Yes, you may sleep in my bed." Harry smiled winningly at him. "We will _discuss_ this tomorrow."

A few minutes later, Harry settled into the large bed and covered himself with the dark blue satin sheets. When Severus got into bed as well, he turned around, facing his professor. And grinned. "You had the sheets changed."

"Of course I did. Do you honestly think I would have let them be as they were, sweaty and sticky?"

"I would never be so presumptuous, Severus."

"Brat. Go to sleep now."

ä ö ü - ü ö ä

(Good night everyone, now. It' sunday and I don't feel like "Christmas"...)


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